At the end, everybody needs to grow up.
But nobody can actually saw it coming, the moment you’re forced to say you’ll take the steer. And as you did, there will be certain things that you will remember. You’d remember the irresponsible decisions, you’d remember the thoughtless actions, and you’d remember the foolish leaps that brought you much pain as well as excitements. But most of all, you’d remember the grand story you were in; one you thought matter for the world.
There was a color you saw, something you cannot describe fully, along with a certain melody that always seems to rhyme with it. You believe that if childhood should ever wear a scarf, it will be of that color. You hate that color now, because you can no longer see it, you can only grasp the idea of it, of fully believing your dreams, of doing things just for the sake of doing, of mocking the world at the end of the street, because you know you’ll change it for sure.
But then you see, at the end. That it is not something you change with laughter, the world. You’d also see that the colors are just a fancy way of saying the word freedom. You will know how to fail, and how to be failed. Because you’re no longer a boy chasing wind that’ll blow the way you meant to. You are needed when you do what others need, not what you believe to be right. You are a single mind in an ocean of thousands; you are matter, just because you smile when you want to scream.
Then I’d say to myself,
that the color will always be that color. That even when dreams collapsed, and pride crushed, it shall never be tainted with the world’s filth. Even when you stop believing your worth of living, when you no longer have the confidence just to say that you’re doing well, that one, eyeless vision of the color can never be wrong. You’ll see yourself protecting it, so that even the word freedom can never fully say what you mean. It will be yours, one thing in life that never left you alone.
That one day beneath the sky, holding your kite, living the world just how you exactly want to live it.